I Talk Too Much.

Remember my chains.

I spent a few minutes in Colossians this morning. In brief, Paul is in prison, and he is writing with joy to a people who had encountered heretical teachings encouraging them to stay the straight path with fervor.

Y'all. He is in prison. With joy. AGAIN.

His last words to the Colossians are, "Remember my chains." In other words, "Y'all better not forget about me here! I know it's bad, but I'm in prison and still spreading the Gospel with JOY. Keep it going, people!"

I'm not quite sure that's exactly how he meant it, but in my head, that's how it goes down.

What in the world does this have to do with me talking too much? And more importantly, where do you come in? Let me take you back a few (five, to be exact) months...

**

May 2015: The last time I wrote (within this medium). You've noticed the radio silence, yes? Looking back at a few of my last posts, I can't help but notice: I talk too darned much.

Yes, I know that's kind of the point as a writer. I'm supposed to engage you, the reader, and enlighten you in new ways and introduce familiar concepts with a fresh eye. I'm supposed to inspire you to find new perspective or maybe even enrage you so you feel stronger than you ever have before.

But I talked and talked until my face turned blue about following your calling, obeying God's will for your life, and rid yourself of the unsettling feeling of not living up to your potential. But while I feel I provided you with sound advice, I stopped short of my promise. I didn't follow through, nor did I follow my own path.

Our dear friend Paul, in his sweet letter to the Colossians, also says this:

Work willingly at whatever you do as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ. (3:23-24 NLT)

I guess this is an apology of sorts. For Talking the Talk, but not Walking the Walk. For painting a picture of what obedience looks like, but not living it myself. And I have no excuse but for the chains that bind me: fear.

The thing about fear is that it's a slow, yet sudden take-over. The swirl of smoke is almost pleasant until you realize it's blazing out of control and has consumed all that surrounds it. So while I continued receive confirmation that The Incredible K be a platform of encouragement, faith, and a little home-y goodness (add in a splash of my cute kiddos), the more I felt as if my words would have no impact. Worse, the more those around me urged me to continue, the more I felt I wasn't equipped to share God's plan for me. For you.

And guess what?

I'm not.

Equipped, that is. But neither are you. Most grand gestures have the greatest impact when they're a step out in faith; a belief in the unknown, but just knowing it's right. The thing is, God has given us each unique gifts to fulfill His glory-filled plan. And when our plans align with His will, we need not be "prepared" in the classical sense, but to openly follow what we know He has called us to do. As Paul says, we are to work willingly at whatever we do as though we were working for the Lord Himself (paraphrased). We're not to work in His glory as a means to an earthly ends, nor are we to work to please the people around us. Serve them? Yes. Please them? No.

Do you feel the needling in the back of your mind? The one that says, "YES! That's it! That's where you're supposed to be!" Is it confirmed often, but you haven't yet taken the steps? THAT is what I'm talking about. When ten different people ask me why I haven't written in a while, then three different friends forward me an email about an upcoming writer's conference, and then I participate in a workshop to determine my God-breathed gifts in my life and WRITING comes up number one? That's it. That's where I'm supposed to be. My lack of follow through despite God-given directives has directly resulted in the uneasy, restless feeling I've had this year, my year of CONNECT. Because I just simply haven't.

What it is for you? What keeps you up at night and gets your heart racing? Come with me. Come as I unabashedly write from the heart, reach out to others, and fulfill the call in my life at this moment in time with joy. And you do the same. Follow that small voice. The Holy Spirit is strong, and He confirms your gifts. Come with me.

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. 

Ephesians 2:10

xoxo, K.

Connecting in 2015

On the first Christmas after Mr. Kuda and I married in 2007, we received a package from his godmother: in it, some marriage books, a gorgeous wooden nativity scene, and one silver paper star: Humble was the word. And a reference to Scripture was written below. How apt, that word, humble; a word to focus on throughout our first full year of our marriage.

Don't think I didn't see the irony of our word that year. Brilliant, his godmother.

Each year we have received a randomly chosen word (or two) since then. Peace for the year our daughter was born. Self-control for last year, when we moved twice and had a big house we thought we had to fill. Funny, God and His timing, yes?

For 2015

This year, and the past three months in particular, has been BUSY. Like, can't keep my thoughts straight, fifteen things going on, BUSY. But who isn't? My excuses for not staying in touch and not keeping up with relationships have run out, and I've GOT to come up with a strategy to reign it all in.

Turns out, there are other people like me! When I found #oneword365, I about hit the floor, because, well, we've been doing this for seven years! Something about making it public, though, that must be a way to keep me accountable.

I'm not going to make sweeping declarations of resolutions for the year to come, but I have come up with some ways for me to connect more. Stop and listen more. Be intentional with my relationships more. This word connect has been swimming in my mind for weeks, and I think I'm on the right track. And, so I'm held accountable for my goals, I've come up with some measurable ways (I am a speech pathologist... Goals must be measurable!) to ensure I'm doing my best to connect on a personal level with those around me. Join me, as we...

How in the world are we going to do that? I'm so glad you asked!

Date Night
Married or not, we need to take deliberate time out and be with our people. Can I get an Amen? Whether it's weekly or monthly. Put it in the calendar now, and stick to it! For us? Monthly date night with Mr. Kuda. At least two family movie/game nights per month with the kids. No questions asked.

Respond
* To emails within 24 hours
* Comment on Social Media, not just "like" posts
* Share someone else's thoughts/blog posts/articles at least once per week

I don't know about you, but I so often think things in my head as I skim through my social media feeds, but just zoom past the post. Why not let others know what you're thinking? Especially if it's positive? This is about relationship, friends, and you only get to the good stuff if you're interacting! As much as we'd like to believe it, "liking" is not interacting!

Brain Dump
I've seen folks with check lists and the like, but this is my technical word: Brain Dump. Part of my problem with connecting this year is that I've been so pre-occupied with, well, everything, that I find myself multi-tasking in my brain while interacting with others. This is the opposite of connecting! In fact, it's quite detrimental to relationships. I've done a trial run this week, and I'll tell you what: It works! If something unrelated to my current task or conversation comes up in my mind, I just write it down and revisit it later. I have a sneaking suspicion this will change. my. life. And while we're talking about multi-tasking...

One Task At A Time
Last night I was talking to a friend on the phone, and it happened: I said "uh-huh," which was a completely inappropriate response because she had asked an open-ended question. Good thing she's one of my besties, because she lovingly called me out on it and wasn't at all offended.

Do one thing. One thing at a time. Interrupted? Stop what you're doing, and make eye contact (ear contact?). Period.

Keep Technology Hours
Writing a blog and running my own business require regular access to either my phone or computer. While I love both of these things, I need to be more specific and deliberate in my time spent online. I hereby declare "internet hours," which I will try my best to keep to:
Monday - Friday: 6:00-7:15, 1:00-3:00, 7:00-8:15, Brief Review at 10:00 pm
Saturday: As needed, no more than an hour.
Sunday: Limited. Check of email and Facebook briefly 1-2 times in the day.

Read the Bible in a Year
All right. Maybe this is a bit resolution-esque, but it's something I know I can do, and one of my people is doing it with me :D  Nothing like a little accountability to keep you going, right? And this: Nothing in this world, your spouse, your children, your career, is more important than your personal and daily relationship with Jesus. Aligning your thoughts with His allows His plans for you to intercede and infiltrate your life. Without daily Bible reading, it's next to impossible to gain this relationship!

I'll end with this...

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord,

"Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."

Jeremiah 29:11-13

It's not necessarily what God is going to do for us. It's about relationship: about us plainly and humbly going to Him. Seeking Him with all our hearts and, as a result, going forward in plans aligned with Him.

Happy 2015, friends! May this new year be full of change, excitement, and relationship! How will you connect in 2015??

xoxo, k.

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Day 31: Five Minute Friday: Leave

Every week, a whole heap of fabulous women get together and write for Five Minute Friday. This month is no different, despite my 31 Day Writer's Challenge. Today's prompt is...

Leave

Go

I'm kind of in love with the fact that this last day of our 31 Day challenge ends in a Five Minute Friday response. Why? Because it ensures us a clean break. A breath of goodbye. A chance to move on without going on and on.

All month we've talked about encouragement, and while I pray that I've touched you in some small way each day, you've been the hero in this story. The outpouring of love and support for these long days has been completely overwhelming and not at all expected. Although, shouldn't it have been? Expected? I don't think I could imagine any less from each and every one of you.

Since my gift cannot in any way surpass what you have already given to me, I'll leave you with this:

Hope.

The thing about hope is that it doesn't matter where you are, what challenges lie before you, and how long it may take to get you there. Hope gives us courage to get to the other side. Hope waits while we sift through the nitty-gritty. And hope provides a pathway even when our eyes can barely see what's coming next.

We did it, friends. Together. Thank you. I pray you find encouragement in each of your days, that you seek out hope, and find the courage to be brave in whatever challenge you may face.

Stop

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xoxo, k.

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